Autism

Motivation is hard – but not really

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Motivation is hard. If you want to do a challenge, don’t do it in all one go – you’ll only put yourself under pressure then. Instead do small steps that will help you work towards finishing the goal.

Say you wanted to do a bit of art, first think what is it you want to do in art. Then decide whether if you are 100% committed to completing it. It also needs to be realistic, something that you see yourself finishing and being proud of what you achieved.

If you choose to proceed with what you decided to make, get the items you need to start to finish. If your not good at art, thats ok, it doesn’t have to be perfect. But with time and patience, you will get there. Take all the time you need, even do a draft of what you want to make – that way you can learn from your mistakes.

This is a picture I recently completed in an art class. I done it step by step with visual help from the tutor. She put masking tape around the edges and asked me and a few others to put numbers 1 to 9 down the sides so we could follow her.

Look beyond the label – part 3

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Anxiety for me is like being angry for someone else. There were times if I wasn’t sure if I was feeling angry or just anxious. What makes me anxious would be losing control of my anger. Before getting diagnosed with AS (Aspergers Syndrome), I became so used to the feeling of being angry, stressed and anxious, it was the norm for me. I became numb to the feelings that I didn’t realise what made me lose control. When I look back now, it was got to do with information overload. Maybe I did feel anxious but I just didn’t notice.

Look at it like this. I like to refer my anger and meltdowns as a volcano. Somebody says something that I didn’t like, I feel agitated, but I let it go like a pinch of salt. This is only raising my anger a small bit. Then something else happens – say if someone pushed or touched off me, that would make me a little bit more angry, considering that I don’t like people touching off me. Over the day or week, the same thing happens over again, by accident of course.

The volcano is at bubbling point at this stage. I don’t say how I’m feeling, not knowing how to express it on my face. Then with a blink of an eye, something triggers my meltdowns. The volcano erupts – and bam I’ve lost control. I insult, shout, cry and then eventually falling asleep over an hour later. This was a constant cycle until I got diagnosed with AS. Then I started to learn, accept, grow and acknowledge that I have AS, and I will have it for the rest of my life. My meltdowns are now controllable and I am well self aware of when I am feeling moody – I like to find my own peace by being by myself. This helps me to control my moodiness and prevents meltdowns

Its never to late to chase your dreams

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Have you ever dreamt of doing something then went of to persue your dream and then someone knocked you back and told you that they think it ‘might be too hard for you’ or ‘it might cause you stress and you might become very sick’? Of course, this happened to me in the past, it was time for me to move on from it so I could focus on the person I am today.

It was kind of a blessing if you think about it! If I wasn’t told to ‘not do that course because it may make you very stressed and make you sick’, I would not have had ‘anger issues’ that would have led me to get a diagnoses of Aspergers Syndrome.

Even though you may not see it at the time, it will all work out at the end. I didn’t give up on my ‘dream job’, I just chose not to make a career out of it. Maybe that person many years ago was just looking out for me at the end of the day. I did feel angry, but accepting the past for what it is now is a dream.

I all ways wanted to be the once, happy bubbly young girl I once was, and now that I am that person again, thats all that matters.

I suppose the moral of this is to go with the flow. You can’t just rock the boat, you’ve to take it all the way even with the bumps in the road! There were plenty of bumps and pot holes for me to become the person I am today, and I am proud of myself for getting myself through that time of my life.

Diagnoses of Aspergers Syndrome

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I have Asperger’s Syndrome and I have difficulty lying so I’m going to be completely straight with you. I want you to share this post to as many people as possible. Please don’t stop reading here, I would like to explain a few things if you would let me.
I was not diagnosed with Asperger’s until I was 22 years old, so yep, I spent all my childhood and my teen years not knowing who I was, or why I was so different to most other people. It wasn’t an easy journey. I didn’t know how to cope, I didn’t like myself, I hated who I was. Every day was a heartache for me.

Even as a child I’ve always tried to remain polite and nice to everyone I meet and that’s something no diagnosis, and no person can change, that will always be who I am. I love helping people. Since finding out about my diagnosis and how those on the spectrum can be separated and disconnected from the rest of society I wondering…. wait a minute, what if I can bring them together? What if I could make everyone happy?

I found out about Temple Grandin and all these other wonderful people on the spectrum that was advocating, succeeding and making people happy. I wanted to do that, I wanted to take myself to another level. I wanted to support and advocate for Aspergers.

Know that you’re not alone. Whether you have Asperger’s, Autism, are a parent, a relative, a friend. You are NOT alone. My Asperger’s makes me very passionate, and you can trust me.